It is far from easy growing up into adulthood
these days. Peer group pressure, online bullying, teenage fashion trends,
relationships, body image, not to mention the demands of teachers and of course
the expectations of parents, can make the business of growing up long and
arduous.
As a former deputy head of a large west
highland secondary school, a significant part of my career involved dealing
with a huge variety of pupils and their parents/ guardians. In this context, I
must confess that on many occasions, I felt heart sorry for some pupils whose
feckless parents had provided them with little in the way of security or moral
guidance.
On the other hand some highly controlling
parents stifled the very creative and energetic lifeblood from their children,
while others still, tried to live their lives through their children, denying
them the time, space and encouragement to grow as individuals.
Brought up in a loving Christian family, my
siblings and I were regularly reminded of the Fifth of the Ten Commandments,
particularly when our attitudes or behaviour sometimes fell short of what was
expected: ‘Honour your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life
in the land your God is giving you.’
As I got to an age when I could read the
Bible for myself, I found with a little glee, that the honour children were due
their parents was not a one way street. The Apostle Paul in his letter to the
Christians in Ephesus explained that parents have a responsibility to conduct
themselves so as to be worthy of honour:
"Children, obey your parents in the
Lord, for this is right. Honour your father and mother. This is the first
commandment with a promise, that it may be well with you and that you may live
long on the earth. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring
them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."
This Commandment is important today, although
it is too often misapplied to young people and their parents only.
Very sadly, 21st century western
culture does not give the elderly the place of honour they so richly deserve
today. The philosopher, Bertrand Russell in the latter years of his life
complained, "I was born in the wrong generation. When I was a young man,
no one had any respect for youth. Now I am an old man and no one has any
respect for age."
Today our local churches and the Christian
media, with its burgeoning music industry honours youth. However, youth is not
the age to which the Bible gives the greatest honour. In the Old Testament the Patriarch
Moses said: "Show respect for old people and honour them", and in the
New Testament, the Apostle Peter reiterated this principle when he wrote:
"You younger men must submit yourselves to the older men".
Writing on the website Christians.org, the editor-in-chief,
Dr. Douglas Beyer says: “The fifth commandment is addressed primarily to adults........it
has more to do with medical care, old-age pensions, and retirement homes than
with disobedient minors. It means quite simply: ‘when your Mum and Dad have to
depend on you, don't let them down.’ Honour your father and mother.
Although social security, health care, and
old-age pensions have largely taken over the kind of responsibilities enjoined
by this commandment, no system can honour your parents for you. Many systems
are terribly impersonal and even insultingly dehumanising.”
Jesus gave the Fifth Commandment its most
potent application when he said: "Truly I tell you, just as you did it to
one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me".
We honour others by treating them with the
same high respect we owe to the person of our Saviour Christ Jesus. Today, our
elderly citizens need more than ever to be honoured in this way and reassured
of their worth.
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